If I could be this happy always...

Merely days before leaving the States, Abbie and I sat in Barnes and Noble searching for probably about 45 minutes for the "perfect" journal for me to take on my trip.

"maybe this one?"

"No, that one is too small/ too big/ doesn't have lines/ isn't the right color"

Finally one just appeared to me, something about it said "world traveler" and again, I just had a feeling. (this whole following-my-gut thing is really working for me lately). Still hesitant about choosing the wrong one, I picked up, walked around with, and imagined living in Spain with each journal after that. None felt as right as the original I had seen. 

The other day, Jaime and I were walking around- she had to buy a textbook and I hadn't been to that side of town really before. While she was struggling in Spanglish to the shop owner, I browsed the store, testing out pens, flipping through notebooks. Then I saw an entire display of journals and planners that were the same brand as the journal I had bought. Except there was a greater variety at the store in El Centro than there was in Barnes and Noble. I found my exact journal, a matching planner, and a file folder as well. I could not believe they carried this brand at this hole-in-the- wall store in Sevilla, Spain!! My heart did flips and I got that intense feeling of pure happiness yet again. 

I sat with my journal today after class with a café con leche at my regular cafe spot (I have a regular spot!!!). It was so brilliant to warm up in the sun and spill my thoughts onto the paper of my very precious journal. Everything is just fitting into place here. Everything feels right. 

While waiting for Jaime later this afternoon, Julia and I shared our first Spanish Capiccino helado, which was amazing and so rich in flavor. Then Jaime, Julia, and I managed to get absolutely lost in a shadier part of town this afternoon. We had no idea how we had wandered so far from where we started, but the sun was beginning to set and we were only getting more and more lost. In our first attempt to gather our bearings, we discovered some really neat hotels that were very elaborate and sophisticated-looking, which was such a contrast to the surrounding streets covered in movie posters and anti- Spanish government propaganda. The second time we tried to get back to la Plaza Nueva, we made our way down several unbelievably small streets- cars' mirrors literally scraped the building walls. We walked past several stores, and then I saw it- at first we simply walked past it- but, once I did the quick translation in my head, I realized we had come across a used book store- which is what I had been searching for since we first arrived in Madrid!!!! There were extremely old copies of Sherlock Homes, Peter Pan, and a ton of collector's copies of Spiderman comic books. I was in heaven! I was doing that weird thing where I would thumb through the literally dusty pages, and I smelled every book, drinking in the years and the eyes that had glanced over those very pages. I cannot describe with words how happy I felt in that store. Every piece of my body was screaming with excitement, and I just wanted to burst out and tell the world about how happy I was. God, it was such an amazing feeling. 

So, that's the highlight of this post- we finally ended up asking a Pharmacist what direction home was for us- which was in the complete opposite direction as we had previously thought. I made it home just in time for some excellent dinner and small talk with my host mom, before hesitantly retiring to bed. 

I never want to sleep here, I feel as though I'll miss something, but it's funny because everything I try to see and pack into my days makes me so exhausted. It's a Catch-22 kind of world, I suppose. 

Buenas Noches.